I always...

I feel like I always mess up.  I was starting to have a good cry about it tonight, but before I got to the I-need-a-Kleenex stage, my eyes rested on the trinkets in my hand.

Two weeks in a row I’ve completely embarrassed myself in front of a room full of children and adults at church.  Tonight it was during a number game I was playing on the board.  Really?  My last night of teaching this group of kids for this year, and I had to leave with a grand humiliation over a game?  (A numbers game.  Should have known I was doomed for failure.) 

I always mess up.  So why do these children swarm over and give me these trinkets (treasures, really).  Hugs.  I love how you teach, Mrs. Fitzwater.  Thanks for the stories, Mrs. Fitzwater, especially the one about the dog.  Don’t they know?  Can’t they see all of my mistakes? 

Mother’s day is only a few days away, and I’ve been reading sweet blogs about moms all day long. 

I always, most every day, feel like I am messing up as a mom.  House too dirty.  Too many meals from a wrapper.  Never enough books or games or time playing.  Saying too much at the wrong time.  Saying too little at the right time.  Should have baked more cookies and read more Bible verses and gone on more bike rides.  

But my kids think I’m a good mom.  My oldest leaves me a note saying so.

  

Don’t they know?  Can’t children see all of my mistakes?     

It’s hard to hold onto failure as I hold this hand full of treasures gifted to me this night.  A pen.  A bracelet.  A drawing.  Because they love me, these children do. 

''

“Love covers over all wrongs.” Proverbs 10:12

So look me in the eyes, you who speak I always mess up, and let me tell you –I don’t think you do.  I think your love shines through and puts those little shortcomings in the shadows. 

You don’t always.