living with insomnia

Today I was remembering Billy Graham's biography (a book so thick it took me months to get through it!). He grew up on a dairy farm, and he talked about getting up around 3:00 a.m. to milk cows every day, going to school, coming home and milking cows, and then doing homework late into the evening. He felt like that constant lack of sleep growing up prepared him for his strenuous life as a world-traveling evangelist, which allowed for little rest. I get so discouraged not getting enough sleep, especially in the afternoon when I'm halfway through the day and still have halfway to go. It seems impossible to keep going sometimes. But my perspective changes in recalling Billy Graham's experience. Is it possible these sleepness nights are building in me a perseverance I will need in service to the Lord in the future? I'm going to work to allow that hopeful thought to change my reaction to staring at the ceiling in the middle of the night.

living with insomnia

Thank you, Captain America. (SPOILER ALERT!) My favorite spot in the movie is when he's being pummeled by the bad guy and says, "I can do this all day." But we know it's not because of his ripped body that he's able to endure it. It's because when he was weak he determined to persevere through pain. And that's what I was thinking of when I woke up at 1:00 this morning and was awake until after 5:00. James 1 tells us to consider it pure joy when we face trials of various kinds, i.e., insomnia (Christy's addition). I know insomnia is a test of faith that will develop perseverance in me, and knowing there is purpose in my suffering gives me joy (mixed with a little bit of slumber party stomach). If I can persevere through a night of laying awake for hours, God's truth assures me that somewhere down the road I will be able to face more difficult trials with steel in my eyes and say, "I can do this all day."